L u c i d

In one moment I tossed the coin, the next I was asleep,
Time never works right when I'm dreaming, even when I'm staring at a clock and believing what I'm seeing.

One minute I was drenched in tears on my bedroom floor,
I rip them away and suddenly I'm shivering--
it's one in the morning and far too cold,
But I don't know if that's why I cannot feel.. help me escape the numbness,
remind me what is real.
I need heat back in my core.
Blink.

My body is fire, I will burn that man alive, I want to consume everything he is and everything he can give.
Heavy breaths, hard floors, I've never felt this before.. but the room is toosmallandhisteethareonmyneckand--
Blink.

I'm crying again, but this time it's different. The world is too heavy, the coin is in the air, everything is changing and I wish I didn't care. My conscience will not give me one second of peace,
the silence screams because everyone else is asleep.
Little did I know I was too.
Blink.

The images blur and the night is dark,
Hot summer air fighting the AC in the car.
The coin has fallen, and I know where I stand, the world doesn't spin under his calloused hand.
Lay my head on his chest, the scene is surely going to change---
Close my eyes and hear his heart beating,
And only then I know
I am awake.

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